Ever since my people brought me home a few weeks ago, I’ve thought they were kind of lame. I got the indication that when they leave the house they\’re out doing fun stuff. Whenever they came back they were always tired and looked happy, but that didn’t do much for me sitting around the house all by myself just sleeping and looking for things to chew on. But this weekend was different. After two days of trying to get me all excited about something called a \”road trip\” they piled bag after bag into the back of their truck, put a couple bikes on the back, and finally invited me to jump in with them.
We drove for hours and hours, and eventually I went to sleep in the back seat. When I woke up, it was pitch black and we were in the middle of the desert. There was a campfire and a big star-filled sky and new smells everywhere. It was awesome. The next morning we got back in the truck and drove very slowly over very rough roads until my people found what they were looking for. It was a big piece of rock. I don’t understand what they were excited about. Who cares about a big rock? You can’t chase it, you can\’t carry it, you can’t chew on it, and it just smalls like rock. What a stupid breed of animal. Anyway, they tied me up at the bottom for some reason. What was I going to do? There was nothing around but miles of sand, bushes, and more stupid rocks things. So, as soon as they started climbing I chewed myself free and then just hung out at the bottom just to show them that I could.
I heard a lot of grunting and cursing and something about them hating offwidths, and a couple hours later they slid down long leashes straight from the sky to come play with me again. Much better. We drove around slow, rough roads some more, and then we went back to camp where more people joined us. Those people had DOGS!!! Lots and lots of dogs. There was even a puppy. We played for hours and hours while the people hung around the campfire and told stories about what they did with their day. I didn’t understand how they could all just sit there and talk when there was a puppy to play with.
So, after another night of sleeping in the back of the truck, we got up again and drove to another place, but this time there were no tall, skinny rocks. There was only a trail. I love trails! They got on these bike things, which are basically ways for people to cheat since they only have two legs and can’t run as fast as us dogs, but whatever, it lets us go fast. We rode and ran and it went on like this for hours. We went for so long and so far that I even got tired of running. I didn’t that would ever happen. By the time we got back to another vehicle, I was moving pretty slow and just wanted to drink water, eat, and sleep. Luckily there was no puppy at camp that night, so I got to rest.
The sun came up once again and I was still pretty tired, but we drove to another trail and I was stoked. This time my people didn’t bring any bikes. Instead they had big packs and we all started to walk, which was just fine with me. After at least an hour of slowly walking up a steep trail we came to another tall, skinny rock. Geeze, these people are sad creatures. Once again, they tied me at the base and began to work their way up the side of this thing. And once again they came back a little while later. I didn’t chew through my leash this time. I figured I had already showed them that I could, so there was no need. After they ate some food and drank some water, we hiked right back down the same trail, got in the truck, and drove for hours until we were back home.
They may be slow, fur-less, two-legged creatures that don’t like to chew or bury things, but I guess my people are OK.
